Thanks Living

Following the death of his father, Nephi was overwhelmed with sadness and fighting anger. Not only was his father gone, he was undergoing extreme persecution from his brothers and their families. He faithfully struggled for answers. He exclaimed, “. . . when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth . . .”

And then he remembers,

“. . . nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted . . .”

“My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep.

“He hath filled me with his love, . . .

“Behold, he hath heard my cry by day, and he hath given me knowledge . . . in the night-time.

“And by day have I waxed bold in mighty prayer before him; yea, my voice have I sent up on high; and angels came down and ministered unto me.

“. . . And mine eyes have beheld great things, . . .”

This remembering inspires Nephi. He is then able to determine who and how he will be:

“. . . why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken because of mine afflictions? . . . Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul?

“Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul.

“Do not anger . . . Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.

“Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation. . . .

“O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy righteousness! . . . Wilt thou make my path straight before me! . . .

“O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever. . . .

“Y'ea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I ask not amiss; therefore . . . I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness.” (2 Nephi 4:19-35)

I was born into a troubled family. My parents died a month before my 7^th birthday. For just short of the next five years, my three younger brothers and I were cared for by my grandparents. And then, due to the poor health of my faithful grandmother and the death of my grandfather, I was separated from my brothers as we were each placed in various homes of friends and family.

By the time I was half way through seventh grade, I fell apart. The family I was with did their best to care for me but I just couldn't seem to adjust this time. My Aunt and Uncle came to get me. Within a year I was adopted and then sealed to them in the Cardston Alberta Temple.

I continued to struggle through my teen years and have had many challenges since. However, like Nephi, I know in whom I trust. I have been blessed and ministered to in many ways. My life is full and I rejoice in it. I can truly say, I know the blessing of life. I sing the song of redeeming love.

I am deeply and profoundly grateful to so many whose faithfulness and testimonies strengthened and nurtured me through difficult days and showed me the way to happiness. From my earliest years, I learned that I was a child of light who was called to “follow that which is good.” I was lead to see and count my blessings.

Our Father in Heaven created a perfect plan to give us every opportunity to fulfill the greatest of divine potential within us. Providing a Savior was pivotal to that plan. Another critical aspect to The Great Plan of Happiness is the gift of agency. We are here on earth to express our true heart's desire. That expression may be best manifest in the way we meet the challenges and trials of life. While we often do not choose the challenges we face, we are able to recognize the love of God all around us and work through the gift of the Holy Ghost to meet those challenges. In so doing, even in the midst of great adversity, our hearts swell with gratitude and we see the bigger picture.

Ultimately, whether or not we will receive all that the Father hath and so willing will give, is really our choice. However, we can also choose for the here and now to enjoy the comfort and peace of our Heavenly Father's love, the gift of the Savior's atonement, and the guidance of the Holy Ghost, regardless of the very real difficulties we experience.

We are very literally created for joy and must not lose sight of that. As guardians of our children and grandchildren, we have great responsibility to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. We must teach them to “live after the manner of happiness” and this we do best as we ourselves determine so to do. I have come to believe that the manner of happiness could also be referred to as a manner of gratitude.

The Poet Henry Ward Beecher rightfully states,

The unthankful heart . . . discovers no mercies; but the let thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour some heavenly blessing.

Difficult and trying times can divert us from that spirit of gratitude and joy but it is not a given! We are free to choose. As we reach for the Savior, just as the sinking Peter, we will be immediately caught up and safely sustained upon stormy seas. (Matthew 14:28-31)

Another disturber of our peace and sense of well being comes from the other end of the spectrum. As Americans, we live in a day of wealth and cultural “pulls” that distract.

Not long ago, a young girl pleaded with her mother for an I-Pad. She was having a very difficult time feeling accepted by the young people in her church class and was trying to think of anything she could do to fit in. Having bought a modest home in which to raise their family, her parents were surprised to find themselves attending church with a very wealthy population, the greater part of which came from another part of the community. The adults of their congregation were a humble and gracious people. They were loving and accepting. They had worked hard to achieve and provide for their families. With their success they purchased large and luxurious homes and many of the trinkets of our day for their children who knew very little of sacrifice. Their well-dressed and beautifully coiffed young, unlike the parents, have difficulty including others who they perceive as “less than.” There is a great divide between the “haves” and the “have-nots.”

What are parents to do while raising children in such a climate of “must have” and “things?” How can they help their children see the child of God in each and every soul rather than viewing some as less than or others as more than? How can they lead their children to happiness and a sense of well-being?

With great energy and love for his people, the prophet Nehpi, son of Helaman cautions his people of the dangers they faced:

. . . how quick [are the children of men] to set their hearts upon the vain things of the world! Yea, how quick to be lifted up in pride; yea, how quick to boast, and do all manner of that which is iniquity; and how slow are they to remember the Lord their God, and to give ear unto his counsels, yea, how slow to walk in wisdom's paths! Behold, they do not desire that the Lord their God, who hath created them, should rule and reign over them; they do set at naught his counsels, and they will not that he should be their guide. Helaman 12:4-6

The sad progression of this story is that while wealthy as to the things of the world, the Nephites continued to sink into the poverty of the ungodly. The great prophet Samuel, the Lamanite was later sent to admonish them:

Ye do not remember the Lord your God in the things with which he hath blessed you, but ye do always remember your riches, not to thank the Lord your God for them; yea, your hearts are not drawn out unto the Lord, but they do swell with great pride, unto boasting, and unto great swelling, envyings, strifes, malice, persecutions, and murders, and all manner of iniquities. Helaman 13:22

You and I want so much more for ourselves and our children. We have a loving Heavenly Father, a Savior and the Holy Ghost who truly have righteous desires for us as well. However, we too at times may become sidetracked or caught up in the ease, enticements and vain things of our day. In the midst of abundance we too may find ourselves spiritually impoverished.

Lloyd D. Newell, BYU professor of Church history, articulated some of the challenges we face:

Stir and noise are a constant part of modern life. Everywhere we go, for much of the day, we hear clatter and clamor, jangle and din. We are wired with ubiquitous earphones and cell phones, computers and dazzling sounds and flashy graphics, and other forms of technology that have accelerated the tempo of life and made it louder, disrupting the more natural and peaceful rhythms. Sound is all around us, dissonance within us, noise everywhere. . . . Too often the world tells us what matters, and we listen. In so doing, we fail to hear the Lord, through the Spirit, offering us a better perspective or “a more excellent way.”

We do not accept whatever the world offers up without a spirit of discernment. We are blessed as we measure the quality our wants and activities through the prism of our true heart's desire. We have the whisperings of the Spirit to caution and direct if we so structure our lives to have “be still” time to know God and his direction for us and for our families. Our lives can be ordered after the nurture and admonition of our loving Father in Heaven. As our eyes are upon those things that matter most, we feel to “Sing unto the Lord with thanksgiving.” Psalm 147:7

Elder John H. Groberg inspires with this thought:

We should always look at the eternal perspective in all we do and say for only by acting according to that eternal perspective can we find safety, truth and joy.

As parents seek happy and thankful living for themselves and their children, great care must be taken to avoid the false sense of confidence that comes with wealth.

In his loving way our Savior is the greatest example of living gratefully. When breaking the few bread and fishes to feed the 5000, he first prayerfully expressed thanks to his Father. He then divided the loaves and fishes among his disciples and commanded them to give. Their expression of gratitude was shown as they then gave what they had received of the Savior. All were filled.

Johannes A. Gaertner puts it this way:

To speak gratitude is courteous and pleasant,

To enact gratitude is generous and noble, but

To live gratitude is to touch Heaven.

It is not what we say about our blessings – it is how we use our blessings and how we love! This is what I desire for my children and grandchildren. Indeed it is what I desire with all of my heart for all of the children of the world – that they may touch Heaven. I know that through “living” gratefully they may so do.

Happiness is not found in “possessing.” Gathering more and more for ourselves and building bigger and better “barns” in which to store that which we gather will not satisfy. Happiness is experienced as we gratefully give from that which we are blessed with. As parents and grandparents, we lead our children in the paths of happiness as we lead them to recognize their blessings as opportunities to serve and give.

As each of us open our eyes and spiritual selves to those around us, as we perceive the real possibilities to love and serve and give, we feel the love of God swell within us. Our capacities are magnified. We very literally become the hands of heaven on earth. Interestingly, as we experience the wealth of heaven, it doesn't take us long to know the shallowness of the vain things of the world. We are blessed with the joy that comes with thanks-giving.

I firmly believe that a spirit of thankfulness propels us in the path of happiness. In the words of Melody Beattie,

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.

We are loved with a perfect love. As we choose to experience that love we are inspired to live gratefully. We become true disciples of Jesus Christ. We live Thanks Giving in all times and circumstances we may be in. We touch Heaven.

As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I treasure the council of President Thomas S. Monson:

“My brothers and sisters, do we remember to give thanks for the blessings we receive? Sincerely giving thanks not only helps us recognize our blessings, but it also unlocks the doors of heaven and helps us feel God’s love. . . . Let us follow [the Savior]. Let us emulate His example. Let us obey His words. By so doing, we give to Him the divine gift of gratitude. My sincere, heartfelt prayer is that we may in our individual lives reflect that marvelous virtue of gratitude. May it permeate our very souls, now and evermore.” (CR Nov 2010)

I Remember. 9/11 2001

The morning began pleasantly. Claigh had just left for the 1 1/2 hour drive to the Tidewater region of Virginia. I turned on the TV in the family room to keep me company as I cleaned the kitchen. Suddenly the whole tone of the day changed as I heard the excited voice of the broadcaster.

I ran into the family room to see footage of planes crashing into the north and south towers of the World Trade Center. What was going on? My heart began to race. I called my daughter and her husband in Arizona (who had recently moved from New York) to tell them to turn on the news. As I stood there, phone in hand, eyes on the TV, I was horrified to see the south tower collapse. My daughter answered her phone and I told her what was happening. Her husband rushed to hook up their TV to receive reception. We were all in shock. I felt glued in place and absolutely horrified at the scene when the second tower fell. The broadcast cut away to inform us that a plane had crashed into the Pentagon. That is when I knew we were under attack. We were told there was yet another plane unaccounted for. Later we received word that Flight 93 had crashed in a field in Pennsylvania.

When Claigh was able to call me and let me know he was safe, he told me there was a need for all of the missionaries to be evacuated from the coast. With the extensive military sites in eastern Virginia and our uncertainty of what could happen next, the church wanted to be sure these young men and women were as safe as possible.

Our mission president had just completed his three years of service, had been released and had returned home. Our new president and his wife were only in place for the weekend. They had a young family needing to be settled. I tried to reach the mission home to see what we could do to help. There was no answer.

At this time, I was serving as Relief Society President for our Midlothian Ward. I called my counselor Pam Marshall and informed her that the missionaries were to be evacuated. We knew they would need to be housed and fed. We began to call the sisters of our ward to see how many we would be able to provide for. By later that afternoon, we had many homes available.

I called the mission home again, this time receiving an answer. I told Sister Kirk we were aware of their need and told her Midlothian Ward was ready to provide for 90 missionaries.
She was deeply appreciative. She told me she hadn't even known where to begin as she didn't know anyone yet. I believe there ended up being 78 missionaries taken care of. Clean beds and good food were in place for these young people as we waited out the next couple of days before they were able to return to their assignments.

The women of Midlothian Ward are some of the most generous and good women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. How I love the organization of the church. Through it we have the capacity to respond as our hearts would desire in times of tragedy.

In the midst of all of this, our 16 year old daughter who was living in Braunsweig, Germany as a Congress-Bundestag student, called home heart broken at what she had witnessed on her host family's TV. It was hard to have her so far away at that time. The American students were at risk as there were many Al Queda cells in Germany. To insure their safety, they were told to be careful to not dress or look American. However, the German people themselves were incredible. Their prayers ascended for America and I am confident they were heard.

Many days following the attack, I learned that a cousin I had never met died in the Pentagon. Brady Howell was a young husband, 26 years old. Our daughter's high school friend's father died in one of the towers. All in all, 2,749 are reported to have lost their lives in this brutal attack. Hearts were broken that day and yet the spirit of freedom carries us forward determined to live and love with greater clarity.

I will remember.

As some of you may be aware, my husband Claigh serves as a member of the Stake High Council of the Ammon West Stake High Council of the Ammon West Stake in Idaho Falls. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is organized into congregations known as wards or for smaller congregations, branches. Groups of wards and branches are organized into what we call Stakes. Isaiah 54:2

I have other places which I will appoint unto them, and they shall be called stakes, for the curtains or the strength of Zion.
Doctrine and Covenants 101:21

Our Stake is lead by a Presidency who is supported by a High Council of twelve men. In the church, the priesthood brethren are organized into quorums or groups that work together to support the work of branches, wards, stakes, areas and the general church. These quorums do much to serve and form a tremendous brotherhood for the blessing of the members of God's kingdom here on earth as well as for many throughout the world of all faiths those without any faith to meet various needs - both temporal and spiritual.

Within the congregational family, we are assigned Home Teachers. Two men are assigned to work together to enable each and every family unit within the congregation to have someone to watch over them. These under-shepherds are able to focus attention on specific needs of individual members.

On our drive home from the Urgent Care Center in Rexburg on the 8th, I called our home teachers to let them know of the accident. That evening Gary and Bob were there to anoint Claigh with oil and give him a blessing of endurance and healing. Gary Meikle, one of our home teachers, is maintaining a fight with incurable lung cancer. He and his wife Jean are remarkable to say the least and have blessed us with such a sense of the possible when faced with the impossible. Gary serves with such determination and an inner strength form the Spirit that over comes the limitations of his physical body. The blessing brought comfort and peace.

On Sunday, just 2 days following Claigh's cave-fall he rose early for his 7:30 a.m. High Council Meeting. I had had a difficult night and was sound asleep. As is in his generous nature, he did not waken me but attempted to get it together himself. He managed somehow to shave and was able to pull a shirt over his head, but there was no way for him to tie his shoes. Part way through the meeting, one of Claigh's fellow High Councilmen, Brother Jordan Jardine, noticed the untied shoes and asked, "Claigh, would you like me to tie your shoes for you?"

It touched Claigh's heart that Brother Jardine had even noticed something so small. What a simple expression of God's love for each and every one of us.

We are grateful!

Do small things with great love.
Mother Teresa

Later that afternoon, we enjoyed a relaxed dinner with the Meikles. They continue to bless our lives.

Monday afternoon, as I was leaving the house to get Claigh to the doctor for the casting of his broken radius, our dear home teaching friend from down the street, Bob Buchmiller, walked into our yard with a weed trimmer in hand. He had come to do our lawn for us. We had felt we could go another week but he insisted that it looked like it could get a little shaggy and he wanted to do it for us. He spent hours and left us in good shape for another two weeks. Bob and his wife Jackie have been dear friends ever since we moved here. During one of my lowest times with the chemo treatments, Jackie came and sat with me for a few hours one afternoon. Just her company when I myself wasn't good company at all made such a difference for me.

Today, one week later, Claigh is much improved. The pain in his sternum and left forearm have subsided greatly. He still wears a brace on his left arm to protect the healing tendons and muscles but has much greater use of his fingers. He is able to tie his shoes and button buttons again (albeit very slowly.) His leg abrasions are coming along. They were not too serious but cause some discomfort with the itching and healing process. Claigh does have annoyance with the cast on his right wrist but that will come to an end soon thanks to the amazing ability of the body to heal. He has been able to purchase a computer program that turns dictation into the written word so he is able to keep up his files for work as it will be some time before he is typing again. He thinks he will have tremendous use for this long term as he spends some time in the car traveling to visit with those he counsels.

Our family has been greatly blessed by Claigh's diligent efforts throughout the years to serve God in every way he can by serving God's children. It is true that you cannot out give our loving Heavenly Father nor even come close. His mercy and kindness never fails! He is a faithful God and will support our meager capacities to give and love in His way. There are many good souls who share this love for God and his children. We so appreciate the outpouring of your love in our behalf through words and actions. Your prayers for us are especially appreciated and have been answered in wondrous ways.

“God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually through another mortal that he meets our needs. Therefore, it is vital that we serve each other in the kingdom.”
President Spencer W. Kimball